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| Make the imperfect partner the perfect partner |
An affair doesn't have to be the end of a relationship. In fact, it can be a new beginning, bring a couple closer than ever. Call me crazy but have you noticed that most relationships that last long have a history of infidelity and it got me thinking what is the reason behind it, don't you wonder too? I spoke few people and there are some of the reasons they gave me
A lady told me that you need to make a decision about his character. If you believe that he's untrustworthy move on. You will always feel like you are settling and he will feel like he can never prover himself . However, if you believe that he made that one mistake, but overall you know him to be a person with integrity and someone you can trust then embrace the person you know him to be. Your love and trust will lift him up and he will shine.
Another told me take responsibility of you side of it. You didn't cause his behavior but affairs are often symptom of underlying issues in the relationship that have not have been addressed. Look hard in the mirror and ask yourself what, if anything, you may have done or not done that contributed to him seeking intimacy with another woman. If you can work on your side of the face it will only strengthen your relationship.
The last woman i spoke to said understand the reality of the affair. It does make a difference if he had sex with her. If he did have sex with her, that is really difficult to get over, but it can be done if it isn't a behavioral pattern. The rule of thumb with affairs is this: if it happens once, you can get over it. If it happens twice or more, it's a pattern, and you can't get over it because it will happen again.
After listening to these 3 woman i came to my own conclusion that nothing is not possible under the sun. Don't throw away a relationship you and your partner have worked so hard to build for that one affair. We do make mistakes and as a couple you should learn to forgive, you might not forget but also learn to move on.
Yeah I dont think that I will be able to get over it! I will never be able to trust him again!. To me cheating is disrespectful! If you truly love someone, you wouldnt cheat on her.
ReplyDeleteNo woman should settle for a cheating bastard cause he will never stop cheating on you once he start cheating on you.
You can have the most loyal wife/girlfriend and the men will still cheat on them like its nothing and its because they can cheat.
Quoting from Steve Harvey's book "Act like a lady and Think like a man"... Men cheats because they can, they think they can get away with it, he havent found who he truly wants, etc... Chech out the book... Its very interesting...
But speaking from experiences, it will never work out again, because you will always wonder if he is still cheating or not... It will only give you a HEARTBREAK and It is not worth it!